Trials of Parenting an 18-Year-Old

This weekend has probably been the most stressful weekend we've encountered in a long time. We went around and around with Nitro. The result was his being grounded until today.

We never ground the kids.

I'm serious.

We've taken things away from them in the past, but never grounded them.

Nitro and Aravis have a handful of responsibilities at home. We have 2 laundry days a week and they're each responsible for one of them. Nitro has Tuesdays, Aravis has Saturdays (sometimes Fridays now instead because of her work schedule). But, for several weeks in a row, it's taken Nitro from Tuesday afternoon to Friday evening to get 5 loads of laundry washed, dried, and delivered to the appropriate bedrooms. We also have a guideline for them: if, for whatever reason, you are unable to complete the laundry on the assigned laundry day, you can ask for help from Mom or you can request an extension. Not a big deal.

After many frustrating conversations, Aravis has finally "gotten" this. If she can't get it all done on Sat. and knows it ahead of time, she always asks if she can finish it on Sunday afternoon or if I will finish it up for her. No biggie.

Nitro simply refuses to ask for help.

It's soooo frustrating.

We finally learned that his definition of responsibility is that if you are asked to do something, you do it when you can and you don't ask for help. He said that asking for help is the same as whining.

Hmmm...

Nice thought, but that kind of thinking gets you in trouble in the real world.

Well, between not doing what he was supposed to with the laundry and copping a bad attitude about it, he got grounded Friday night.

On Sat., he did something else he's been told NOT to do...repeatedly. He was working on his car and spread out all the greasy tools he was using on the chest freezer in the garage.

Problem 1: He's been told not spread tools out on the freezer...OVER and OVER again. There is an old buffet out there that we've kept specifically so he has a place to spread them out when he's working. (In fact, said buffet is going to the dump once he moves out of the house. lol)

Problem 2: We are in the process of trying to sell the freezer. We would prefer that the finish on it be in as pristine condition as possible if we find a potential buyer.

Problem 3: Even after going over this with him, he still insisted that he hadn't done anything wrong. And that it was a "stupid" rule.

*SIGH*

The most interesting thing that I learned from this weekend was that I am living the "Ultimate Parent Curse". You remember the one: "When you grow up and have kids, I hope they act just like you!"

Yep.

Nitro is my son....through and through. When Muftak gets frustrated with him, he always says, "I don't get it. I was rebellious when I was a kid, but nothing like this!" I just smile and say, "Yeah, but I was." :o\

It's hard to believe, but I was a holy terror my senior year of high school. I was soooooooo rebellious. Some of it was normal...but, most of it.....wow.

When I think back to some of the things that I said to my parents, I get embarrassed! I had such a horrible attitude!

The best part of growing up, though, is learning that you're NOT all that and a bag of chips. lol

Several years ago, I apologized to my parents for how I acted when I lived at home...esp. during my senior year. My dad just smiled at me and said, "So you finally learned we're not so stupid after all?" lol

I'm just looking forward to the day when our kids realize that we aren't so stupid after all. I know it'll happen...whether they tell us or not.